Is your teen ready to date?

If that title just sent you into cardiac arrest, relax, you are not alone. Parents everywhere start to panic even when their teens try to mention dating, but it doesn’t need to be a crisis situation. We have some helpful tips and information that can prepare you to navigate the tricky waters of your child’s dating years.

First of all, this is not a situation where you can afford to put your head in the sand and think that if you ignore it, it will go away. Teens need you as the parent to help them set their boundaries. Rules are important because they help teens to feel safe. Communication is KEY!

When your child first comes to you with the information that they have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, we recommend that you sit down with them and ask what their definition of the word is. Depending on their age, it could have a lot of different meanings.

You will need to decide what is appropriate behavior for your child and then clearly define your expectations for them. If you want them to wait until they are married to have sex, then tell them so. After all, they can’t read your mind. Also, beware of sending mixed messages with talk of contraception. When teens hear: I want you to wait until you are married to have sex, but if you do have sex, please use a condom. All they hear is: Use a condom and you can have sex.

When it comes to setting an age that your teen is ready to date...there isn’t a magical number that works for everyone. Be careful not to say when your child is younger “When you turn 16, you can date.” Because your child still may not be mature enough at age 16. Instead tell them that when you feel they have shown that they are mature enough to deal with the issues that come along with dating, then you will sit down with them and discuss it.

Remember, you are the biggest influence in your teen’s life. Don’t be afraid to set the bar high for them and with your help, they can reach it!